— Monster Energy —
So, it's that time of the month again. Month... huh, I really ought to do more of these come to think of it, but it's not like any of you actually read these reviews to begin with, you silly devils. But for what it's worth I can't help but feel a sense of duty when it comes to writing these so called "reviews" as they're called, so let's get on with it shall we?
The Monster energy drink, where to begin and where to end. It's a sacred drink that goes by many a name, a drink for by both Kyle's and Boomer's alike. It's a drink with the power to unify people and split oceans. Personally, I have had a very "on and off" type relationship with the monster energy drink, not unlike with my schizophrenia medication, but not drinking enough monster does not make the voices tell me to "spill the blood of the whores upon the lord's virgin soil" (whatever that's supposed to mean), at least not yet, so it's not that great of a comparison. And there is of course also the problem of the kidney stones, but there's nothing some elbow grease and a Nintendo ds stylus won't fix.I think my good friend Arek puts it best: "i never drank it, i prefer our local brand of energy drinks"
The monster energy drink has a very "hmm okay" kind of taste to it, but as far as things called monster go, it's quite impressive really, at least when put into perspective. But all in all, it is a product that I enjoy consuming.
So that's another review done with folks, I know that you all want me to put out more of these, but it's not as easy as you might think. You all sit there believing all you have to do is take a sip of some mediocre drink, slap you keyboard around like an unruly child for 5 minutes and you have a Foodio review on your hands, but alas it's not that simple I'm sad to inform you. But hey, at least the wait is worth it.
So, to finish of the review with another quote from my dear friend Arek: "jesus is in hell, drowning in boiling semen, so his opinion doesnt really matter
(at least according to the jews)"